They should tell you when you’re born: have a suitcase heart, be ready to travel…

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This morning I read Shweta Nanda’s article on empty nest. I applaud her to acknowledge something like this and not shy away because of the celebrity status quo.

Some of her call outs in the article made me think that may be for homemakers sometimes it’s more difficult than the women who have career outside. Homemakers focus, and dedication is all around the home and associated with it and hence when kids go away the void is bigger than what the working women can feel and that is because working women share some space with outside world whether it be with work and with colleagues and friends.

“You will never achieve what you are capable of if you’re too attached to things you’re supposed to let go of.”

Homemakers have to start from the scratch and that itself is a change which could be challenging, one can feel that more in the article.

I also read in her article about “life is flawed, there is no such thing as a soulmate and nothing lasts forever is so empowering.”

This statement made me a bit sad or should I say I still want to believe there is something called soulmate and yes when nest is empty one can plan life with their soulmate, it could be traveling, a peaceful walk/hike or even spending time together doing similar tastes of hobbies. But given that kids have gone and now your partner is also not there then definitely its individual choice that one needs to make and for a working woman she may have many options by choosing a job which gives more travel opportunity or travel to different country and work there as long as you want to stay there and move on to next and so on.

But yes, when you hear nothing lasts forever that kind of gives you freedom and hence it is empowering.

“We have nothing that is really our own; we hold everything as a loan.” ~ Nicolas Poussin

All this tells me is process for detachment and this doesn’t have to be until the kids leaves the nest. It can start early by teaching your kids to be independent early enough to manage their own things with parental guidance.

I often think of those moments where kids will go away, and my heart should not cry or depend on them. Of course, as a mother you will always care for the well-being of your children but when children have left then we should allow them to lead their life the way they want as by now we have raised an adult who will make the decision that is appropriate for them at least.

Basically, it ends up with a task completion of raising kids and let them fly and we move on with another task which should be nourish yourself that gives more happiness and contentment in life.

“If you depend on others to make your dream come true, it may not ever happen.” ~ Dawn

~ Dawn

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“Compassion will cure more sins than condemnation”

Yesterday I was supposed to post this but got busy with things and didn’t get a chance so here it is.

When people say no matter what you should forgive others and move on, it’s not a morality thing only or a saying or a quote.
I believe we all are human and hence we make mistakes and we learn from our mistakes. It’s easy to say learn from others mistake but some situations never come around as if it’s going to repeat someone else’s mistake. It’s just that we are not aware of things at times or situations that make us fall for and later repent. These kinds of mistake we do and better be learn a lesson from it. At the same time, the mistake that we do what impact it brings on others is a big one depending on the type of mistake.
Some mistakes we do is by getting hurt and some mistakes are by hurting others. In all this I believe if we all understand and forgive each other it is like a meditation. I remember my grandma used to tell there is nothing bigger than forgiveness.

“Forgiveness does not change the past but it does enlarge the future” ~ Paul Lewis Boese

Actually, it is true because when someone makes a mistake and instead of forgiving if you show the grudges or anger which is natural that as human you might have those emotions because you are hurt, then the person who made the mistake instead of feeling sorry would feel that good he did that. It’s a natural instinct because if we don’t treat each other with empathy we turn into avengers.

However, if you after lot of processing of course it is not easy because many times its the kind of grudge or ego that we all carry doesn’t allow us to forgive and hence we all need the time to heal and make that attempt to forgive.

“To heal a wound you need to stop touching it”

The story is that when someone has made a mistake and they are sorry for the same, and forgiveness is given thats the most tough time for the one who has made that mistake as he is feeling so much regret and ashamed of what he/she it helps them to atone for their mistakes.

Otherwise, anger only brings anguish and revenge.

Forgive those who have hurt you because either they are not aware of it or did things accidentally. For you to live in peace is to forgive them and for them its your forgiveness that makes them mostly to reparation.

~ Dawn

Be happy and live happy…!

nutrition

A poetry for the Nutrition month of the year for Hyde Park Poetry @ Thursday poets rally.

Life can be dramatic,
Weather can be tragic,
News can traumatize,
What can you do at times?
People can be mean,
A character or disdain,
Its in everyone’s gene,
What can you do?
The world may torn apart,
Your ways can go apart,
Think one thing in life,
Nature also rejuvenates,
After every stormy night,
Eat healthy, sleep well,
Nourish your soul,
Nourish your body,
Regain your strength,
Empower your life,
Add one ingredient,
Need good nutrition,
To lead your life,
The healthy you are,
Most wealthy you are,
To face this world,
Gain your inner strength,
Feed your life,
Be happy and live happy,
Until you die 😉
~ Dawn

Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that…!!!

Today I marched in support of the student’s movement ‘Our lives matter’, ‘March for Our Lives’, protest against guns and gun violence.It’s funny that when I was growing up, I never had to get into any such activity. What I love about my childhood is that there might be great matters that adults involved in bringing their voice together but as a child in school I never had to protest or do a march against anything and I take that as a blessing for my life in those days.
Imagine today’s kids are not only stressed about getting good grades or understand a particular problem or concept for exam but also worry about their existence … being alive.

It’s a shame on us!!! We enjoyed our childhood and didn’t make sure that it continues the same or better for our next and many future generations to enjoy that childhood in peace. I have marched for many such protests in this country and each time it was for an equality cause. Sometimes it was due to the inequality, for LGBTQA, for Women and now for Children – it breaks my heart. I was marching along and on and off my eyes fill with tears because whenever I think or see a child I go back to my days and its such a pleasure to be there that I have often said to myself – “wish I could go back and pause that moment”.

“Peace cannot be kept by force, it can only be achieved by understanding.” ~ Martin Luther King Jr. 

It’s sad when I see kids marching for their lives.
Many motivational speeches were made by students, teachers, and representatives and then someone gave a speech calling out the President of America as the “orange guy”. It put me off there and then itself.
What are we talking about? Peace? Equality? When are we going to learn to respect one another? When? You talk about change and equality and peace but at the same time you put a racist remark and there goes your equality, change and peace.

“An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind”

People take anger and courage as one, people were marching against gun laws and the anger is towards the current administration but I don’t think one can solve anything with anger.
It was amazing how the crowd out there was all about peace and for the children when two students came to me and said can we ask a question and I said sure!

“Do you think there should be cops in schools for protection”?, my answer straight came from my heart as ‘No’!
Because school should not need protection. Schools need more facility and support for education. You need more teachers, students, principal and books. There is no need of guns, a protection as long as teachers are doing their job of teaching and protecting the kids. I went to a school in India and my school don’t have a cop, military or even a gun. The students completely agreed with my opinion as they also felt there is no need of another armed personnel in the school.
I strongly believe, to bring real peace we need to love our enemies. It is tough but we have to be realistic and think about it before its too late. Love your enemy because hatred is only going to bring hatred, anger and revenge then. Let’s not call anyone names, lets be human and ask for peace! March only for PEACE!

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

~ Dawn

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone…!

It’s amazing to do reflection and I used to do this as a kid sitting on my study table. The table was a huge one and those days it was made of teak wood the expensive one. In front of the table was a window and I always used to get carried away by nature, sometimes clouds, sun rays, birds chirping or even the cat who is looking for its prey.

“We don’t learn by doing, we learn by reflecting on what we have done.”

The mind has no limitation and so does the heart, I always felt we are only guiding this body in one or the other way as if this mind and heart as a huge responsibility to carry them to their destination.
In this world if I relate then I feel we take them until they leave this body here and move to next journey after catching the flight called death ;).

Life should have changes, should have ripple effects or else it’s boring. That’s how I have felt. If there is nothing new then its not fun and probably that’s the reason when everything was good in India with my job, I felt that I need to take that one way ticket to an unknown destination. Today I feel good about that decision because that one step helped me to take many more such steps in life to keep going.

“Life is about trusting your feelings, taking chances, finding happiness, learning from the past, and realizing everything changes.”

We are responsible for our actions and I do believe if your heart agrees with your decision then its matter of mind to make sure things work as per the heart. I guess that’s what is my guiding principle. When heart is not happy then what the hell mind is going to do? The monotonous routine and I get bored with that.

“Change is the only constant in life ” ~ Heraclitus

Today as I am coming back after a farewell meet, I asked myself – do you feel that you took a quick decision to leave? do you think you had a smooth job and a continuation and you just dropped it? My heart without taking any time to think spontaneously said, I am happy that I have something new to look forward to. I did my best what I can give and if I don’t have anything more to give then it’s better to move on to somewhere else.

I need change and only I can bring that to myself hence a very timely decision I feel. No matter how old one gets its the craving for learning is what keeps you young and heck yeah I want to learn more and be young too :). As I said, mind and heart are the ones who don’t age. It’s the body that these heart and mind are carrying.

Time for a new journey with new sightseeing and adding new stories to life. I welcome this change in my life and embrace it with love.

“Making a big life change is pretty scary. But, know what’s even scarier? Regret.”

As I embark on my new journey, I am taking lot of lessons learned from my previous journey and going to miss the people to whom I touched and who have touched me as well.
This journey has taught me about so many things, about people, their emotions, their reactions, sometimes how people mix profession and personal life, and sometimes you just learn how things work and how things doesn’t work because we don’t think from heart.

I talk to my heart at times
It’s good to be happy and nice
But then there’s a place and time
When it hits the peak of love
You know it’s time to say goodbye
You good until you’re welcomed
Or else you get kicked sometimes

I think change is good, it brings happiness, new beginnings and hence it keeps it exciting.

Should all acquaintance be forgotten and never brought to mind?

“You can’t truly understand something until it happens to you. The meaning of life is discovered in the experience.”

~ Dawn

Happy Birthday Dear Rahi :)

A day old Rahi

It’s Happy International Women’s Day today, yet for me it’s special because it’s my Son Rahi’s birthday.

Each year on birthdays a mother walks the journey again from the day she conceived her child. It’s a path that no mother gets tired or bored of because in each year the journey becomes more interesting and meaningful with memories. With each year, I see him growing more aware yet challenging. Sometimes, I have all the answers for him to think rationally yet sometimes I am speechless to his questions which make me wonder at times.

“Why do we have to go to school, why can’t I just come to your office and work?”

Sometimes you find it cute and sometimes you think is there something that I should worry about?

“From the moment they placed you in my arms, You snuggled right into my heart”

After all a mother is a mother who has always fear and worry to make sure her child is safe and sound in this mean world.

I am proud to see Rahi, being polite yet telling those kids who bully him and his other classmates, how not to hurt the feelings.

When I visit his school for field trips or color runs, the mothers of his classmates come and appreciate Rahi, I feel content.

I want my kids to love and spread the love across the world even where there is hatred.

Looking at Rahi who is 11 now, makes me feel my son is growing up yet his feminist thoughts and support for the needy makes me feel how matured he is getting.

“Let me love you a little more before you’re not little anymore”

Rahi, you not only surprise me with your every day story from school, you also make me proud of you for who you are. I loved when you wore Katie Perry’s t-shirt and boys in your class bullied you, you stood up for yourself and didn’t hesitate to wear it again even though I reminded you of the bully. I like the way you ignore certain things and I do love the way you share small things that took place in your class. It only makes me happy and teary with joy.

Rahi,I wish you a very happy birthday and I will say never change because I would not want you to change anything about yourself for anyone in this world.

You are so pure and pious in your heart that you melt everyone’s heart. Those who bully you also know this and hence sometimes they are jealous of you. Be patient with them as they need some time to understand and realize about things that they don’t think of many times.

We don’t know what they are going through in their life and hence they react in certain way which hurts others in many ways.

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“My Son you may have outgrown my lap but you will never outgrow my Heart”

I see many times your leadership skills when you talk to your seniors and your classmates telling how not to bully or say bad words for girls and how to respect them just like how you would do to your sisters and moms. You make me feel a boy like you is always a joy 😉

“Son, may every dream and wish you have not only come true but also lead to an amazing future for you”

A very happy 11th birthday to you Rahi!

~ Dawn

Even I can fly..!

20110911_df1_20110723_1021_018-022 mistle thrush taking off from wire along bridleway to north 1-5 of 5 (montage @7fps)(r+mb id@1024)

Before budding,

and during flowering,

Many transitions,

phases and emotions

processing through.

After flowering,

while withering,

petals falling with,

 fear of heights,

many emotions,

wrapped in mind,

gulping humiliation,

mental torture,

fear of ambiguity,

the discomfort coats

of life.

The time came,

from kneeling I stood up

threw away the coat,

of fear and discomfort,

didn’t let worry to reside in,

yet the freedom is far away,

but the very thought of it,

brings the sight of joy,

and feel the pain of kayak,

yet at the end of it,

Even I can fly,

Spreading my wings high.

~ Dawn